If You Think I Have a Funny/ Silly Name...

I get a lot of stick because of my name...especially from Manure fans. WTF? What's wrong with naming myself after my idol, the great Steven Gerrard? At least it is not as laughable as, say, Berbatov Singh, rite?

Anyway, I told myself that the best remedy when someone's making fun of you is to look for someone else for YOU to make fun of. So that's exaclty what I did. I Googled for footballers with funny names for you to laugh at so that you will not laugh at me.

There's one condition though, I only look for footballers with funny first name, not surname. Because, well, it's not your fault if your family name is Shittu or Kuntz, right? And it could also be  wee bit racist to laugh at one's surname. First names though, IMHO, is fair game.

Here I bring you the Top Ten Funnyballers:

1. Creedence Clearwater Couto (Brazilian forward in Belgian League)

Named after his parents favourite band presumably. Well, at least he's lucky his parents were not that into Pink Floyd

2. Limited Chikafa (Zimbabwean forward, plays for Zimbabwean club, Caps Utd)

Limited in what way, I wonder?

3. Laughter Chilembe (Zambian midfielder, Caps Utd)
LOL, literally.


4. Danger Fourpence (Zimbabwean defender, Caps Utd)
Walked right out of a James Bond flick


5. Wonderful Peperere (Zimbabwean goalkeeper, Highlanders FC)
I can only imagine the commentary after he makes a brilliant save..."Wonderful save from Wonderful".


6. Progress Musepa (Zimbabwean defender, Masvingo Utd)

7. Godbless Asamoah (Ghanian forward, Kessben FC)

Amen...


8. Daddy Bazueya (Nigerian midfielder, Enyimba International FC)
Who's your daddy?


9. Thankgod Amaefule (Nigerian midfielder, Sharks FC)


10. Two-Boys Gladstone Gumede (South African forward, now in US)
Haha...'nuff said

Reaction To Chelsea's Transfer Ban

OMG! Looks like somebody's really pissed at Chelsea's transfer ban...

Steven Gerrard: A "True Blue" Liverpool Supporter

OMG...I am sure all of you have read about the Chelsea transfer ban debacle. (And the best thing is...Manure might be next...ROTFL!) Anyway, I think the blame shouldn't be put solely on the football clubs. Of course, I am NOT saying that the clubs are not guilty, but the players themselves should have more integrity and loyalty. But sadly, nowadays, most footballers are like modern day mercenaries...they leave at the first sniff of big bucks (read: Ronaldo - greasy haried; not fatty one, Adebayor, Tevez, Barry etc.)

It is very hard to find loyal footballers. And for that Liverpool are fortunate. They have two players in Gerrard and Carragher who would give their dives lives away for Liverpool. Especially Gerrard, a true Liverpool fan from his early days. I was thrilled when I stumbled upon a cute photo of young Gerrard posing with some Liverpool silverware (I think it's the Charity Shield and old Division One Championship trophy).

 

P.S - strange, I didn't know Liverpool ever had a blue kit...hmmm 

 

International Football Week

Sigh...No EPL matches this week due to International friendlies. Well, at least I will get to see Steven Gerrard in action against Slovenia. Go Gerrard!!!Go Three Lions!!!

Here's a video of Gerrard playing for England. The title says it all: "ENGLAND'S BEST PERFORMER!!!"

I am Broke!!!

Shit! Recently, I lost a RM500 bet to one of my college mate, Brian. Since I do not have enough money to pay yet, I have decided to stay away from him. As luck would have it, I stumbled into him in the toilet this morning. 

I told him my predicament. Thankfully, he was quite reasonable. He accepted a downpayment of RM45 (my pocket money for the week!!!) and gave me up to next week to pay up...I am gonna look for a part time job from tomorrow onwards.

 

Btw, I have finally decided to create a Facebook account. Please add me as a friend. Looking forward to meeting you on Facebook. Here's the link to my account:

Gerrard Lim! 

Futsal Tuesdays!

I am knackered. I just got back from my weekly Futsal game. It's pretty frustrating when your team sucks. We lost again...7 - 2.

I scored both my team's goal and set up a couple of of chances for Farid, but unfortunately, his finishing was as good as Berbatov (LOL). The scoreline would have been at least more respectable if he were to convert those chances.

The team looked depressed after the game. Being a good team captain (a trait I picked up from Gerrard), I went over to comfort them (although I was furious at their poor performance tonight...especially the defenders).

"'Rite...good game lads. As Bill Shankly would've said..a team tha..."

"Shut the hell up la, Gerrard!" Farid cut me off.

"Oi...you should respect your Captain ok??"

"KNN...CCB!!!Since when you the captain?" Fei Chai (Fatty) Leong, our goalkeeper hollered.  

"Fuckers...at least I scored two goals OK??!! What bout the rest of you fucktards?? Niamah...can't even defend properly" I was seething at that moment, nearly punched Leong in his fat face.

"Niamah...WTF? You were "marking" their goalie the whole game...we had to cover for you OK!"

"It's strategy you idio..."

Rajan kicked the ball at me.

"Pundek...strategy my arse la...go fuck off la. Next time we'll get Bobby in the team la...even the sissy play better than you!!!"

Fuck it...I got no time to argue with low lifes...I will find myself a new team next week.

I guess I can somehow emphatise with Adebayor now. How the hell can you stay motivated when your team does not appreciate you...

You guys better watch out next week...I will be back.

I Got Spammed By An A-Hole

I was looking forward to a nice Merdeka morning today. I was about to go down to my local Mamak stall for a Roti Kosong and Teh Tarik when I decided to check my e-mail:

From: RoyKeane16 [mailto:gloryglorymanutd@hotmail.com]

Sent: Monday, August 31, 2009 3:46AM

To: Gerrard Lim [mailto:xxxxxx@gmail.com

Subject: nice joke to perk up your morning

----------------------------------------------------------------

Hey Loser!

Here's a joke for you:

A Liverpool fan went to his Doctor.

Pool fan: Doctor! Doctor! My arse is talking!

Doctor: What does it say?

Pool fan bends over.

Arse: Liverpool will win the Premier League this season!

Doctor: Ahh...not to worry. A lot of arses say this nowadays...

Regards,

The Red Devil

Fuck!!! Who the hell is the Red Devil??!! Fucker!!! I wasted 3 hours googling for Manure jokes to reply to this anonymous wanker.

I bet it's Adrian...bitch!